Comic 1127 - Reasonable situation ..

22nd Jan 2015, 9:00 PM
Reasonable situation ..
Average Rating: 5 (22 votes)

Author Notes:

Centcomm 22nd Jan 2015, 9:00 PM edit delete
But it works!
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Vivocateur 22nd Jan 2015, 9:07 PM edit delete reply

Heh XD
I like how well Teedee and the Medisacer are getting along.
Centcomm 22nd Jan 2015, 10:53 PM edit delete reply

Yep hes actually a nice guy :D
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 9:31 AM edit delete reply

They are definately on the same wavelength. :)

Meanwhile Mr Popolopilis is down two legs, and he's PISSED !
But with a little luck, he can still get his jaws on the surviving redshirts.

Also, EMpori Barclay just managed to not only fullfill his contract, despite his goods getting shot with a canno, but also make a profit on something he has in storage. AND he got a writ that makes Connie safer as well.

Not a bad deal at all. :)
Haegan2005 23rd Jan 2015, 7:03 PM edit delete reply

Oh, I suspect the res shirts will be asked to go "Rescue" Mr Pop! Though they may need to use the restroom before hand. Otherwise I foresee some accidents during the operation. In more ways then one... :D
CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:31 AM edit delete reply
the trick is to get one of those tanks converted into tow trucks for other tanks.
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:15 PM edit delete reply

Yeah, just drug the murderturd to it's gills, and then drag it by the tail with some heavy industrial machine, should be no biggy.
Speedy 21st Mar 2017, 10:03 AM edit delete reply
But, did they smuggle enough mutated medicinal weed from what used to be Colorado?

Wait... Forget that. They DO NOT want the murderturd to get the super munchies.
jamie59 22nd Jan 2015, 9:12 PM edit delete reply

LOL! TeeDee's not giving up!
Centcomm 22nd Jan 2015, 10:53 PM edit delete reply

Hells no :D she wants one :D
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 9:32 AM edit delete reply

But ofcourse she does.
It's the perfect pet for her.
LewDav 2nd Apr 2015, 2:17 AM edit delete reply
Yup, it eats tanks. *laughs*
Dragonrider 22nd Jan 2015, 9:17 PM edit delete reply

TeeDee-TeeDee remember Ada and the baby Murder Turd.
Centcomm 22nd Jan 2015, 10:54 PM edit delete reply

heheh i think she remembers how freaked out Ada got.. thats what makes it funny..
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 9:33 AM edit delete reply

Besides, with daily beatings, it might even become docile enough for riding.
CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:29 AM edit delete reply
Daily beatings from a pile driver...
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:16 PM edit delete reply

... a piledriver known as TeeDee.

No way in hell she's gonna leave such an important task to someone else.
Personal pride 'n' all that.

DizzasterJuice 22nd Jan 2015, 10:38 PM edit delete reply

Save me a murder-turd egg too! ...and the blown off legs. I have, ah-hm, use for them.
Centcomm 22nd Jan 2015, 10:54 PM edit delete reply

Ill try to have one shipped out as soon as the mercs recover it :D
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 9:38 AM edit delete reply

How big are those eggs ?
Can you play soccer with them ?

Surely they would be tough enough. :D
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 1:39 PM edit delete reply

I can almost see it for me ...

... hrmmm ...

Commentator : And the Defender pass the egg to the midfielders
Commentator : The midfielder pass it on to the striker
Commentator : striker hammers it in towards the goal
Commentator : But the Goalie snatches it out of the air like it was nothing!
Commentator : The Goalie is pointing towards one of the far off attackers
Commentator : And he kicks the egg off ... but what is this?!
Commentator : The egg is stuck to his foot, and he's screaming in pain, could it be ?
Commentator : YES indeed, the baby murderturd has finally hatched !
Commentator : And the teams change, out goes the soccer players and in comes the pornstars!
Commentator : This year, Sasha Grey gets to the murderturd first and what a hit she lands!
Commentator : Those improved knuckle gloves really seem to work, the baby murderturd actually seems stunned.
Commentator : Could it already be over ? But no! Lana Cox got too close, and it has clamped on to her thigh.
Commentator : Lilly Lovely are having none of it though and look at that drop kick,
Commentator : ripped the murderturd right off of Lana's thigh, what a beauty!
Commentator : And while the combat medics are dragging Lana and Goalie away,
Commentator : Maya Hills stomps on the baby murderturds little tail with her spiked combat boots!
Commentator : Lilly Lovely try to kick it in the eye, but misses.
Commentator : Tiffany Towers finally arrives, and she's not messing about, she bodyslams that turd like she means business!
Commentator : She may be one of the oldest pornstars on the field, but she has experience and weight behind her
Commentator : Those gigantic knockers are good for something!
Commentator : Sasha Grey is back with a punch to the back of the neck, going for another hit in that nervecluster.
Commentator : It doesn't seem to do much good though, by now the murderturd is probably riding on a wave of adrenaline.
Commentator : But she gets away clean, and that opens up the scene for Nikki Benz and she also goes for a Tail stomp, nice!
Commentator : But she's not fast enough and the murderturd swipes her off her feet .. and .. oh no, it got her!
Commentator : The Murderturd got Nikki Benz in the jugular people, it looks like she's down hard!
Commentator : The combat medics try to get to her but it looks bad.
Commentator : But look at that, here comes Jenna Jameson, having held back she's picked up a lot of speed
Commentator : BAM, look at that low kick, I swear I saw her steel stiletto heel dig into the soft skin there !
Commentator : What an absolute ringer of a hit, Jenna still got it.
Commentator : And WHOA, Tiffany Towers follows that up with another bodyslam of hers,
Commentator : DAMN, I could almost feel the tribunal shake all the way up here, what amazing power!
Commentator : Looks like the combat medics got Nikki Benz just in the nick of time too, well played pornstars, well played.
Commentator : Lilly Lovely is coming in hot, but the turd is faster and it's got her ankle in a vice jaw grip.
Commentator : Sasha Grey gets a good hit in on that nervecluster in the neck again, but that little murderturd is NOT letting go of Lilly's ankle.
Commentator : But here comes Jenna Jameson with another highspeed lowkick, and the murderturd is ripped away from Lilly.
Commentator : Her ankle looks really messed up though, but the combat medics have an easy time getting to her, so she should recover.
Commentator : Meanwhile Tiffany Towers have gone for another bodyslam and it's a hit !
Commentator : Sasha Grey lands yet another very precise hit, and the murderturd is looking pretty groggy already.
Commentator : Maya Hills try a jump on the spine, but to no effect, and only barely gets away.
Commentator : And that baby murderturd sure don't look groggy no more, in fact, it looks PISSED OFF !
Commentator : But that doesn't slow down Jenna Jameson none, she makes another brutal low hit.
Commentator : But what is this, she fumbles her recovery and the murderturd has bit on to her ass!
Commentator : Sasha Grey tries another hit for the nerve cluster, but simply glances off the spine.
Commentator : Maya Hills make another jump for the tail, and connects, very good landing there.
Commentator : The murderturd has let Jenna Jameson go, and have grabbed on to Maya's arm, how will she get away from that?
Commentator : Combat medics are dragging off Jenna, while Sasha Grey makes another dart for that illusive nervecluster
Commentator : This time it's a direct hit - and the murderturd very reluctantly lets go of Maya as well.
Commentator : And just like that, we are down to just TWO pornstars, Sasha Gray and Tiffany Towers !
Commentator : What an incredible reversal by the little murderturd - It's hard to understand just how nasty they are fresh out of the egg.
Commentator : Tiffany Towers waste no time, and go for another bodyslam, and makes a clean getaway too.
Commentator : Didn't seem like it hit that hard though, but any attack you can walk away from is a successful one.
Commentator : Here comes Sasha Grey for another hit .. but ... she turns away in the last second, and WHOA !
Commentator : It was a feint, and it set up Tiffany for another fantastic bodyslam ... AND ANOTHER ! AND ONE MORE !!
Commentator : Tiffany is on fire today, those bodyslams are just raining down on the little murderturd, and it's not looking happy, not happy at all.
Commentator : And she just keeps on going, what was that, six ? .. no seven .. SEVEN bodyslams in a row, holy moly - What amazing stamina.
Commentator : And sure enough, here comes Sasha Grey, aiming for those weakspots with her steel heel .. and .. YES !! She punctured an eye.
Commentator : Finally, some actual damage has been done to the murderturd!
Commentator : And I can hardly believe it, but Tiffany Towers is still hammering it with those massive bodyslams of hers.
Commentator : .. AND IT'S DOWN !!
Commentator : I can hardly believe my eyes, the Murderturd Is DOWN !
Commentator : The murderturd is on it's knees, will pornstars finally win?
Commentator : Tiffany is approaching it veery slowly, and ... and ... she put her hand on it's head without it snapping at her !
Commentator : Meanwhile, Sasha Grey is wisely keeping her distance, because a murderturd will only accept one mother.
Commentator : Still, what an absolutely amazing fight, and a well deserved win for the dynamic duo that was Tiffany Towers and Sasha Grey !
Commentator : Tune in again tonight as we re-visit the goriest clips from the fight and make fun of Goalie.
Commentator : Don't forget to watch Tokyo Rose Broadcasts, where WE show YOU the latest news about scandals that YOU don't want US to know about.
Commentator : I am the commenter AI, and it has been a pleasure to comment on "MURDERTURDS VS. PORNSTARS!!"

Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:00 PM edit delete reply

Bloody hell Sheela .. LOLOLOL !
Dragonrider 24th Jan 2015, 12:15 AM edit delete reply

I think you had entirely Too Damn Much Fun With This.
CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:28 AM edit delete reply
I think...
I think my brain just blew a fuse
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:17 PM edit delete reply

I might have had a bit of fun with it .. yeah .. I don't see a problem with that. XD

I might also be selling some fake fuses.
DLKmusic 23rd Jan 2015, 12:02 AM edit delete reply

well, if things don't work out with search and rescue, looks like Teedee can get a job as this priest's assistant!

Told you they were kindred spirits!
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:00 PM edit delete reply

heeh - too funny :D
mjkj 23rd Jan 2015, 12:42 AM edit delete reply

*lol* TeeDee is not going to be persuaded otherwise...

...poor Ada *hugs her*

Nice of church guy to give Connie a commendation letter... *hugs Connie*

But Mr. ... Barclay should have known better than to mention the eggs before TeeDee...

Stormwind13 23rd Jan 2015, 4:00 AM edit delete reply

Yeah, agree with you there mjkj. Mr. Black should have KNOWN better to mention the eggs anywhere around TeeDee.

Ada is NOT going to be amused. CentComm is probably going to be even LESS amused.

::HUGS Connie too:: At least things are starting to balance out for her.
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 9:37 AM edit delete reply

Good on Connie, she deserved a bit of good luck there.

Maybe she even get some hugs ? :)
mjkj 23rd Jan 2015, 5:08 PM edit delete reply

Yeah, I guess she will get some. :D

*hugs Connie*

Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:02 PM edit delete reply

Yep untill the situation changes Connie is in the clear :D
Dragonrider 24th Jan 2015, 12:17 AM edit delete reply

Which will be in what 30 minutes at the most?
CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:25 AM edit delete reply
look at it this way, one of those eggs probably costs more than Teedee makes in a year. They're probably among the rarest commodities on the market
Skweeee 23rd Jan 2015, 6:17 AM edit delete reply

I couldn't help but notice the desktop screen in the background.

Is that Christoper Walken or David Bowie?
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:02 PM edit delete reply

Nither actually .. hehehe... Dont Blink... thats my only clue..
mjkj 23rd Jan 2015, 5:13 PM edit delete reply

Yeah, the screensaver has changed
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:29 PM edit delete reply

I thought it was iRobot ?
Fairportfan 25th Jan 2015, 10:15 PM edit delete reply

The Doctor?
Centcomm 25th Jan 2015, 10:28 PM edit delete reply

good guess Fairport ! :D the Dreaded weeping Angels...
Greenwood Goat 23rd Jan 2015, 6:25 AM edit delete reply
I can see it now...

TeeDee: Good boy, Ripper, goooood boy! Now sit, and *ungh* balance the treat on your nose... yeees... wait for it... waaaait for it... Now! Good booooy! Was that yummy? Well, here's another one! Now chew this one slowly... slooooowly!! Yes! Goood booy! ... Alright, I'm sure you gutters all get the picture. Now, you know what I'm looking for, so I'm going to ungag you one by one, and you're going to spill your guts, either for me... or for Ripper, which sounds like this- *ungag*

Chewtoy gutter: [redacted due to highly distressing nature of vocalisations] *gasp* *sob* [same again]

TeeDee: *smiles indulgently* So, who's gonna go first...?

>:=)> If anyone could do it, it would be TeeDee.
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:03 PM edit delete reply

heheh .. again you guys are too funny :D
KarToon12 23rd Jan 2015, 8:45 AM edit delete reply

What's she going to name it? XD
Dragonrider 23rd Jan 2015, 9:10 AM edit delete reply

Sweetums of course.
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 9:37 AM edit delete reply

Mr Popolopolis Junior !

But only because Ada keeps vetoing Mr PooPooHead
DLKmusic 23rd Jan 2015, 11:46 AM edit delete reply

nah... Teedee would name it "Applejack" after her favorite cartoon
velvetsanity 23rd Jan 2015, 1:22 PM edit delete reply

No, no, she'd name it Gummy!
Stormwind13 23rd Jan 2015, 3:23 PM edit delete reply

What she named it and what she CALLED it would probably be two different things. :-D When someone asked for the name, it would probably be something like: Samael, Azrael, Yama or Abaddon. In her own mind though, TeeDee would probably name it Butterfly or Pretty Princess or something like that. :-D
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:04 PM edit delete reply

Dies laughing at Velvet.. too funny ..
Kitty 23rd Jan 2015, 8:14 PM edit delete reply
Either something sicky-sweet like "Snookums" or "Babycakes" or something very much more to the point, like "Killer" or "Fang". :)

Ada better lay in a BIG supply of headache stuff.
CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:23 AM edit delete reply
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:24 PM edit delete reply

Hah, Frank the Murderturd .. yeah, that actually works quite nicely. :)
The Old Scribe 23rd Jan 2015, 12:04 PM edit delete reply

I hear that fried Scythe Lizard eggs are quite the breakfast treat, especially when served with a rasher of Murderturd jerky strips, seaweed grits and phytoplankton bread.
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 1:42 PM edit delete reply

Unfortunately, it's also radioactive.
Stormwind13 23rd Jan 2015, 3:25 PM edit delete reply

Plus the heavy metals would make a person sick. Probably be fatal, eventually. NOT recommended, unless it is your last meal.
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:04 PM edit delete reply

yeah im gonna go with last supper food...
EyeQuestOn 23rd Jan 2015, 2:01 PM edit delete reply

It's as though Mr. Barclay [Or whatever he's called: anyone know what his real name is?] has planned ahead for all eventualities... He is obviously a deep DEEP planner... So he had this beast on hand in case there was an over curious guard or whatever in his path... [No puns are intended!] Even, seemingly, has allowed for all eventualities including any mistreatment of Connie, his Engineer... Or maybe he is just good at extrapolating, his circumstances inclusive of his associates with the ensuing parameters, from where he is/ they are into the future... [A bit over the top there but hopefully makes the point.] So Cent, Rose does this make any sense to you: please explain...

Regrettably this is my 1st post on your site as generally am on the edge of my seat awaiting the next twist... You are, for me, on the top of the pile when my live bookmarks come in... By the way when is the next influx of a batch of page redoes...?

As all the strands seem to be converging, can now see that this is turning out to be interwoven team effort... BUT am still, as I have been from the beginning, rooting for Dolly to be the biggest star!!!

Thanks guys, love your excellent work,...

EyeQuestOn (Ian from Brighton, Sussex, UK).
Sheela 23rd Jan 2015, 2:54 PM edit delete reply

I suspect a bit of column A and a bit of column B.

For example, if someone orders one whole murderturd, they are likely to be interested in some murderturd eggs as well, thus more profit, if he brings them.

Now, he probably didn't plan ahead for Mr Redshirt banging on the container that the murderturd was in, however ... if you were transporting a murderturd, and knew you had to let it out of the container at some point, you might bring a remote control along with you.

And then, when the Redshirt opportunity came around, all he had to do was click on .. one .. small .. button.

Even if it wasn't originally meant for that, it was an opportunity that presented itself. And Mr Black is nothing, if not an opportunist. :)
Stormwind13 23rd Jan 2015, 3:50 PM edit delete reply

I think you are right, Sheela. Mr. Black is an opportunist; however, I'm not convinced that he let that thing out. Too much chance of it doing collateral damage that he didn't want. But I wholeheartedly agree that he knows his customers and made sure to have EXTRAS they would be interested in to sell them.

And he is going to get whatever he can out of them to NOT declare economic warfare on them. That 'sergeant' was an a$$hole and damn near got Nova Roma removed from the trading routes. Mr. Black isn't likely to let them forget it either.

I don't think most of that was PLANNED though. To my thinking he had a legitimate buyer, someone he could probably get some 'favors' for because it was such an unusual item. Gave him a valid reason to be in Nova Roma, and probably the umph to spend a little while with his good friend, Medisacer Lepaedus enjoying what Nova Roma has to offer. Probably on someone else's dime even. :-D

When the a$$hole let the murder-turd out of the bag though, Mr. Black adapted. That is something he is very good at, thinking very FAST on his feet. :-D
Some Ed 5th Jun 2017, 5:00 AM edit delete reply
I don't think most of it was planned either. But a scythe lizard is the kind of thing that would probably be on an open wish list for some time. As a contingency planner, it's the sort of thing that Mr. Black would say, "This could be useful now. If I can motivate the right people - I know they never want to do direct business from Nova Roma, and usually people want to do too much markup to make it profitable for anyone to handle this one. But I can afford to make little to no profit on this run, just in case things go completely sideways in customs. Also, the buyer certainly has connections that could be helpful and would really appreciate this."
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 3:58 PM edit delete reply

Welcome - welcome ! Thank you for your awesome comments! Mister Black has this amazing ability to know when something is going to go sideways and plan for it.. again welcome to the comments !

as for reboots those are at the Mercy of Rose at the moment ..
highlander55 23rd Jan 2015, 8:37 PM edit delete reply

@Stormwind13. In this case Mr Barclay was not only thinking very fast on his feet but he probably was also running very fast with his feet and beat Connie to safety.
Guest 24th Jan 2015, 4:17 AM edit delete reply
I can promise you that *someone* knows Mr. Barclay/Black/Green/Davis/Lambert/White's real name is. *grin*

As much as I'd love to lay claim to perfect foresight, Sheela pretty well has it pegged. Plan ahead as far as possible (preferably with at least one backup plan for each stage) and be ready to improvise like mad when Saint Murphy the Ever-Cursed and Omnipresent shows up. And, oh yeah...always cut the cards when somebody else shuffles. :-D
Stormwind13 24th Jan 2015, 11:41 AM edit delete reply

You sure, guest? He may have arranged an accident for that person already! =O Personally, I doubt he would do that; however, it is a dangerous world, especially in the wastes, so those from his childhood may not be around any longer.
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:20 PM edit delete reply

Whenever someones deals me a bad card, I throw the dice at them.
Big, heavy dice made of hardened steel.

*sage nod*
DLKmusic 24th Jan 2015, 2:33 PM edit delete reply
Welcome to the FAN Club, EyeQuestOn! There's always room for more!

If you haven't already, you should also check out Luna Star... Same Top Tier Artwork, Stellar Dialog, and Unique Story Telling ability that makes Data Chasers so great. It's also done by our Dynamic Duo, Cent-Comm and Tokyo-Rose!!!

mjkj 25th Jan 2015, 4:04 AM edit delete reply

Link: Luna Star

...or use the link below the comments...

Rashala 23rd Jan 2015, 3:58 PM edit delete reply

*Facepalms* I have a Distinct Feeling The ENTIRE New TRoy population and every CEntcomm doll when TEdee gets home with that egg are going to yell "NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Centcomm 23rd Jan 2015, 4:04 PM edit delete reply

pretty much dead on there :D
Rashala 24th Jan 2015, 1:29 AM edit delete reply

What can I say.....I know Centy "_"

though I have a mental image now...Two pictures on showing Tdee in full battle armor riding an armored and armed MT into battle Laughing and totally at bliss causing carnage.....And then Bubbles of thought showing She is asleep in the ship a HUGE grin on her face hugging a small stuffed MT to her chest. And Marcus asking ada ...what you think she's dreaming about....and Ada saying I really don't think we wanna know....
Antonious 23rd Jan 2015, 5:35 PM edit delete reply

ROFLMAO with a spit take. Medisacer, you are NOT helping things. Ada might be the one to respond to YOUR next medical emergency. Do you really want her upset? Ada: "Hmmm, where did I put those blunt hypodermics and the habanero laced vaseline for the thermometer?"
Lukkai 24th Jan 2015, 1:35 AM edit delete reply
On the plus side he's made a favourable impression on Teedee. And it would seem to me that that's both not that easy for a meatbag and something she does remember.
Antonious 24th Jan 2015, 4:03 PM edit delete reply

Agreed. I lay odds they become pen pals.

Dear Medisacer;
How is Stumpy doing? Did you get him to accept the cyber legs and not keep eating them?
Your friend;
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 9:36 PM edit delete reply

Hah ... "Stumpy", good one. :D
CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:19 AM edit delete reply
I sometimes wonder if you guys read the comments for ideas.
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:23 PM edit delete reply

Without a doubt, they probably do.

However, they also work on the comic several pages ahead of what we see here, so by the time we bring up an idea, they have usually already made the page where it could be used.

That said, TeeDee might have become more Murderturd happy by now, than she would have been, if the comments hadn't been so overwhelmingly in favor of a TeeDee + Murderturd combination.

tl;dr - The makers can read ! who woulda thought?
Centcomm 24th Jan 2015, 2:23 PM edit delete reply

Not for ideas :D but they are awesome :D
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:25 PM edit delete reply

They can write too! XD
mjkj 25th Jan 2015, 4:07 AM edit delete reply

CptKerion 24th Jan 2015, 10:36 AM edit delete reply
I kinda want to set up a cage match between the murder turd from here on Data Chasers and the Warbeast from the Alternity Tabletop stardrive setting.
Centcomm 24th Jan 2015, 2:23 PM edit delete reply

hehe that would be funny .. I could give you7 its stats in Rolemaster format .. I dont know the other system, :D
Sheela 24th Jan 2015, 2:27 PM edit delete reply

Let me guess, it gains strength, resilience and stamina when it's angry ?
Sheela 25th Jan 2015, 3:16 AM edit delete reply

I spy with my little eye ... a new Centcomm avatar !
mjkj 25th Jan 2015, 3:54 AM edit delete reply

Yup, me does, too.

...and it is a great one, too...
Stormwind13 25th Jan 2015, 7:22 AM edit delete reply

Had to clear my cache to see it. I like it, but not sure who it is supposed to be. :-)
Centcomm 25th Jan 2015, 1:30 PM edit delete reply

Its Pearl from the HUB RP we do here as drawn by Ten Penny officer .
WintericeUK 27th May 2015, 9:45 PM edit delete reply
Oh, I'm crying I am laughing so much as I read this! You have made my year, if not my decade! I love that she even drew diagrams for the priest (did he seem stealthily amused himself?) and this could only have been improved with the Benny Hill theme.... which is now playing out in my head and I'm crying with laughter again!
Futurity 23rd Oct 2016, 2:14 AM edit delete reply
TeeDee is fucking awesome... who wouldn't like a chic who wants a giant killer lizard for a pet?
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