Comic 1593 - Supernova Gold

15th Jan 2019, 9:00 PM
Supernova Gold
Average Rating: 5 (21 votes)

Author Notes:

Tokyo Rose 15th Jan 2019, 9:00 PM edit delete
Tokyo Rose
I swear, I don't know if it's just that the salespeople get mad commissions, or the corporation sends them daily pictures of their loved ones clutching newspapers while being held at gunpoint.
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Haegan2005 15th Jan 2019, 10:37 PM edit delete reply

The answer, Rose, is yes.

Tokyo Rose 17th Jan 2019, 2:22 PM edit delete reply

I am unable to argue this point.
Sheela 22nd Jan 2019, 3:08 AM edit delete reply

That's odd, you're usually quite blunt. πŸ˜‚
StLOrca 15th Jan 2019, 10:40 PM edit delete reply

Jesus God, this page is holy and magical and should be worshipped.
Centcomm 15th Jan 2019, 11:06 PM edit delete reply

wow i think i love you!
Tokyo Rose 15th Jan 2019, 11:28 PM edit delete reply

Spoken like someone who's dealt with aggressive upselling.
Evervigilant 16th Jan 2019, 2:18 AM edit delete reply
They are all the same. I deal with AT&T and it is like the mafia. Once you are a part of the family you can't get out. They keep making offers you can't refuse and suck you back in. Gift cards, special discounts for extra features all sound good. Then you call customer support for help or your trial discount period ends and BAM! Say you want to leave and you might find a horse's head on your pillow. LoL
Oldarmourer 16th Jan 2019, 10:44 AM edit delete reply
It's all about the upselling, one of my sons was tech support for a cable company to remain nameless...but it started with a 'C'...he was very good at his job, until they decided tech support had to upsell as part of the repair process whereupon he was dismissed for not making his quota for sales even though he had a 100% repair rate. Of course the call centre's gov't funding running out for his position but it 'reset' for a new hire didn't have anything to do with that......
Siren 16th Jan 2019, 9:07 PM edit delete reply
Charter Spectrum calls regularly trying to upsell, and there's no reason for them to have my contact info because I have NEVER been an account holder.

All I did was be roommates with a Charter customer. That's it.
knuut 16th Jan 2019, 1:00 AM edit delete reply
I vote for building an alter before it upon which they (and their legal departments) can be sacrificed!
Sheela 16th Jan 2019, 7:55 PM edit delete reply

I have tried something like this - I used to sit in third-level tech support, which means only technicians of the company had the number. And even then, we were instructed to upsell.

We didn't, but that's another story. 😠
Sevian 15th Jan 2019, 11:37 PM edit delete reply

Yeah, I think you managed to convey the feel of this one rather well.

I have a curiously strong urge to implant a large object into her frontal lobe.
robnot 16th Jan 2019, 12:01 AM edit delete reply
i really think (for safety) ,, that sales ought to be told , that pasty (Noctis) is there for a reason.!!
cuz sales has no clue who she is dealing with.. an doesn't need to know , except that she is a V.I.P. ,, an that means NO touchy.!!
TMLutas 21st Jan 2019, 8:53 AM edit delete reply
The sword is visible from the front, no? That, too, is advertising of a sort.
SeanR 17th Jan 2019, 2:21 PM edit delete reply
Wrong end.
DLKmusic 19th Jan 2019, 12:40 PM edit delete reply

I don't know, SeanR... I suppose it depends on where her head is at the time!
Just_IDD 16th Jan 2019, 5:25 AM edit delete reply
I felt this way every time I tried to purchase home internet. I don't watch TV and I don't have any need for a home phone.

Now my issue is with apps that want my contact list. They all seem to think that that's important for them. That and they want there app to run at startup for no apparent reason.
Some Ed 16th Jan 2019, 9:35 AM edit delete reply
This reply is really just so I can vote 5 for the comic, but, um, yeah, absolutely been there and hated that. Telling them that I don't own a TV and have never owned a TV since I moved out of my parents' place doesn't seem to do anything... unless it convinces them to go off script for just a moment to say something like, "God, that must be nice", but then continue to press for the full package regardless... with words that sound like they're just going along with what I've agreed to, despite being what I explicitly disagreed with.
TMLutas 21st Jan 2019, 9:01 AM edit delete reply
I have an app in my head that actually needs access to your contact list. Is there a reasonable way to differentiate myself from the jackholes who are looking to harvest names and addresses in order to sell to them?

The app sorts out who lives in what legislative district so if you want influence on a bill, you can find out that X contacts live in y districts that actually matter on the issue because they are on the appropriate committee, etc. It can't be done without contact list access. It's one of the two core databases (the other being for each bill which district matters).
megados 16th Jan 2019, 5:48 AM edit delete reply

A good guardian must have plenty of sales resistance!
highlander55 16th Jan 2019, 6:34 AM edit delete reply

@megedos.. That big sword would make her understand with a lot of reason why not to keep the pressure up.
megados 16th Jan 2019, 3:12 PM edit delete reply

Yeah, that represents the upper end of incrementally applied sales resistance! :D
Bullwinkle 16th Jan 2019, 8:40 AM edit delete reply
If that sale robot is any good, he is using info on Luna com to create a customer profile to push other products and services.
Starts with Teenage girl with roman accent in New Troy accompanied by armed android.
Greenwood Goat 16th Jan 2019, 9:17 AM edit delete reply
Miranda: ...What say we leave your 'droid out of this and talk options?

Noctis: What say we avoid bad ideas in all forms?

Athena: *finishes diplomatic business* (was following the upselling as well) *steps in* *ahem* Acantha will have an L-Pod Microtablet LS-4220, with the full premium security configuration including eyes-only screen function and impregnable-class wireless earpiece. Pay-as-you-go contract. We will also need one-time firmware unlocking codes for a full diplomatic reprogram. Furthermore, attempting to implant anything in Acantha will represent a severe diplomatic breach, and may be considered an act of war against New Rome.

Miranda: :-o ... ;_; I'm sorry. I really am. It's just if we don't upsell at every opportunity... I might lose my job, be in breach of my contract, get sued, and... *shows them her own phone, with email dated last night, titled "Keep up the good work...", with pictures of two kids asleep in their beds* ...those are my nieces. *sniffle*

Omar: +!!!+ +That's enough! You will-+

Noctis: *moves* *presses Omar's reset sequence* ...Threat detected. Neutralised too.

Athena: Let's find the security system.

Noctis: Affirm.


Omar: ... +Reboot complete. Runtime interrupted. Shop system interrupted.+

Acantha: Hello? Hello! I'd like to buy a balloon on a stick, please.

Miranda: I'm afraid we don't sell balloons on sticks here. But could I interest you in a classic Luna-Comm L-Pod Microtablet?

Acantha: I suppose. How much-

Miranda: I can upgrade you to the full premium security configuration to ensure your communications enjoy complete and guaranteed privacy.

Acantha: I don't think I'd need-

Miranda: Full encryption across the device, instantly wipes the keys and makes your data unreadable if stolen, and Luna-Comm's Key Vault will ensure that your data can be recovered later!

Acantha: Well, I suppose... I must have a pay-as-you-go contract though.

Miranda: Of course. And our impregnable wireless earpiece - full sound blocking for complete privacy - no point in having the premium security without it!

Acantha: Okay.

Miranda: Okay! Let's do the paperwork! Omar, go get an LS-4220, an LC-A10 earpiece, and (whisper) add on a one-time firmware unlock code as a sneaky extra. She won't notice!

Omar: +Upselling quota reached. Forced selling level: high. Good work.+ *heads off*

Athena: *watches Omar* Hang in there, Miranda... we'll be commencing a thorough investigation into this franchise's business practices very soon.

Tom 16th Jan 2019, 10:03 AM edit delete reply
When I got to balloon on a stick I lost it. Well done.
Tokyo Rose 17th Jan 2019, 2:25 PM edit delete reply

"Balloon on a stick" got me too, but really, the whole thing's great :D
mjkj 16th Jan 2019, 1:20 PM edit delete reply

*lol* textbook salespitch just does not like deviations from the norm =P
HiFranc 16th Jan 2019, 2:32 PM edit delete reply

Miranda: [tries to sell implant again]

Noctis: My charge will not have that procedure and Centcomm guaranteed me her safety.

Miranda: It’s perfectly safe...

Centcomm: The young lady is a foreign dignitary. Any medical procedure that is not supported by both her and her bodyguard will not be permitted.

Any such acts would be seen as an aggressive move by her Government. If I had to choose between the lives of all my citizens and the life of one salesperson, make no mistake that the safety of the city comes first.
Ictuan 16th Jan 2019, 2:45 PM edit delete reply
Okay, this made my day and reminded me why I never set foot in a phone store or cable company office to buy something. OMG! 300 years in the future or 3000 years in the future, sales people will probably still be the same.
HiFranc 16th Jan 2019, 2:46 PM edit delete reply

It reminded me of a documentary I saw about car salespeople.
KarToon12 16th Jan 2019, 4:27 PM edit delete reply

I think it's the latter answer and not the former.
Johninaustin 16th Jan 2019, 5:02 PM edit delete reply
Meh, not as bad as the local Sprint store. They pull knives on you.
Thracecius 16th Jan 2019, 5:54 PM edit delete reply

Pfft! Haha! Someone has experienced sales "customer service" before, and obviously the aggressive kind. I've been fortunate not to have been pressed too hard in that regard, though the young guy in the Verizon store DID manage to get me to buy a tablet and hands free mic/speaker (even though I don't really use them) when I finally had to break down and buy a smart phone. He wasn't pushy though, so I didn't have to give him a "hard stare". ;) The only thing he tried to push me on was a Samsung, but I politely told him that I'd stick with Motorola after my flip phone survived for over 8 years. Considering my current phone is already 4+ years old and still going strong, and my sister got her Samsung a year later and has already had to replace it, I feel vindicated. ;)
Siren 16th Jan 2019, 9:16 PM edit delete reply
They really hate when you know what you want and what you want is cheap.

Granted, corporate doesn't like employees who listen to their customers' wants over sales quotas.
Hornet 21st Jan 2019, 9:55 AM edit delete reply
Sales girl is just following protocol. Kind of like the Police still give you a field sobriety test after you've admitted to being drunk.
DLKmusic 21st Jan 2019, 4:44 PM edit delete reply

or say "Don't lie to me cause I can smell it on your breath" when you haven't been drinking
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