Comic 1594 - But My Commission

22nd Jan 2019, 9:00 PM
But My Commission
Average Rating: 5 (15 votes)

Author Notes:

Tokyo Rose 22nd Jan 2019, 9:00 PM edit delete
Tokyo Rose
Sorry for the late posting. The cold virus needs to fuck off into a volcano.
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Naesten 22nd Jan 2019, 10:38 PM edit delete reply
Late? What does that even mean in this context? Wait, you're not dead, are you?
HiFranc 22nd Jan 2019, 11:57 PM edit delete reply

Hundreds of years and they still haven’t learnt to make sure that products are properly tested before release.

On the mouse over text. I used to go for the latest but I learned my lesson as well.
Deoxy 23rd Jan 2019, 7:57 AM edit delete reply
It's not about "learning" - that's not the problem. The problem is the disconnect between market, marketing, executives (and their compensation) and the the engineers*.

To be fair, the engineers will want WAY WAY WAY too long to make sure it's perfect, so it's understandable why they can't wait for the engineers to be ready, but still...

* AND, since the reasons for that disconnect lie in human psychology and what humans interpret as "leadership" (basically, as very specific form of extreme self-confidence, to over-simplify a bit), I don't see any way to solve it. It's the underlying cause of politicians being so awful - as much as we hate them, we still choose them.
Naldru 26th Jan 2019, 11:35 AM edit delete reply
From the standpoint of the engineer.

I am not a perfectionist. I merely desire a close enough approximation that nobody else can tell the difference. It isn't hard.

If marketing keeps making changes up to one week before product release, it is impossible to test.

In a number of cases, engineering has reasons for not implementing changes. I remember Microsoft bragging about features that weren't in UNIX. It later turned out that the introduction of those features introduced severe performance and security problems.

In some cases, marketing wants to introduce changes that the engineers know will simply annoy the users. If you've ever dealt with the ribbon menu on Microsoft products, you will have an idea what I'm talking about.

It takes time and money to implement features properly. Reducing the time and using inexperienced .designers will damage the product.

Making things more reliable and secure requires effort and experienced designers.

I have to stop before I start foaming at the mouth.
Oldarmourer 28th Jan 2019, 8:19 AM edit delete reply
There comes a time when even the best sounding 'extras' have to be looked at as unnecessary as just pretty things that nobody uses and will only waste finite platform resources. It's like putting turn signals on a cruise can certainly add them, but why ?
HiFranc 22nd Jan 2019, 11:57 PM edit delete reply

I hope that you get well soon.
chrystal_dark 23rd Jan 2019, 12:43 AM edit delete reply

Just so nice to have someone who can tell you the truth about a product before you buy it!
Rashala 23rd Jan 2019, 1:12 AM edit delete reply

Know the feeling on colds......mega vitamin c does help a little. And yeah love the....oh crap a savvy customer look on her.
Sheela 23rd Jan 2019, 12:05 PM edit delete reply

Citrus fruits such as Mandarins, Clementines and Oranges are good too. πŸ˜ƒ
Oldarmourer 23rd Jan 2019, 6:12 PM edit delete reply
thanks for sparking my memory on all things phone and fruit based...

now I can blame you for this ;)
Oldarmourer 28th Jan 2019, 6:23 PM edit delete reply
Triple Sec, Cointreau, Grand Marnier...

An old downhome cure for the flu is to set a bottle on the foot of the bed and drink until you see two bottles then go to bed and wake up either cured or too hungover to care ;)
mjkj 23rd Jan 2019, 2:24 AM edit delete reply

Wow, great Lynn is there for advice... =)
Brother Parvus 25th Jan 2019, 8:32 PM edit delete reply
"It's so nice to have a geek around the house."
StanKl 23rd Jan 2019, 5:44 AM edit delete reply
You folks reached page one six two six. Means nothing, really, but is an achievement, anyway. Next page will be one six two seven, which will mean nothing as well, but it is satisfying to see that the story goes on. Long life to our heroines.
Sheela 23rd Jan 2019, 12:06 PM edit delete reply

………. Heroin has a shelf life ?
Cuddle Lion 23rd Jan 2019, 3:53 PM edit delete reply

I just hope she doesn't have a "sell by" date.
robnot 24th Jan 2019, 7:19 AM edit delete reply
three years from manufacture... if it has turned pink (normally off white) then it has gone bad...
Sheela 24th Jan 2019, 10:12 PM edit delete reply

Three years, huh ?
Interesting .. I never knew that.
robnot 25th Jan 2019, 9:08 AM edit delete reply
it turns pink because the ethyl acetate is evaporating out of it...
megados 23rd Jan 2019, 6:02 AM edit delete reply

Re: A/N, Rose I hope you don't have the cold from hell we all got around here! I swear I have been sick since 2018. I got over most of it a while ago, but can't get rid of this cough. Screw mucus.

As far as onomatopoeia goes, I would go less smoke, more toilet flush. :D

But yeah, I have tried going latest and greatest a few times, (This isn't restricted to comms/phones) and have found it's best to wait until the bugs are fixed, and see what shakes out as being solid, like Lynn suggests.

Great (and accurate) page!
robnot 23rd Jan 2019, 6:40 AM edit delete reply
snirk,, pipboy..
Sheela 23rd Jan 2019, 12:09 PM edit delete reply

Ha ha, yeah … the creatrixes are fans of Fallout. 😁
robnot 24th Jan 2019, 7:21 AM edit delete reply
but hopefully not of "76"
boo hiss..
megados 24th Jan 2019, 7:40 AM edit delete reply

Oh god, "76"! Bethesda shot themselves in the foot with a machine gun. The sad part is that there was so much wasted potential there. I'm not a huge MMO fan anyway, but they really screwed up. I'm just keeping content with the single player Fallout mods.
Sheela 25th Jan 2019, 9:07 AM edit delete reply

I haven't tried 76, is it really that bad ?
Mirta 30th Jan 2019, 10:26 AM edit delete reply
Fallout 76 was a classical example of executive meddling at it's finest.

Since the release of Elder Scrolls: Arena, Bethesda has had a somewhat good thing going for them where their games are buggy as hell yes, but their games are decent and immersive with a devoted fan base dedicated to rolling out mods to fix any issues that crop up.

Corporate on the other hand, saw all the money being made on MMO's and microtransactions and decided to get in on that and pushed the developers to create Fallout 76 with a very limited timeframe resulting in the enduring clusterfuck that dominated the latter half of 2018.
guest 25th Jan 2019, 9:25 AM edit delete reply
Ok,, I'm at a loss here? Since all guns are machines. Which gun are you talking about?
That's like saying I drive a machine car...
Gilrandir 25th Jan 2019, 9:51 AM edit delete reply
"Machine gun" is a common term used to denote individual weapons capable of fully automatic fire -- implying that Bethesda shot themselves in the foot not once, but repeatedly and with great and sudden violence.

Examples would be the Thompson Submachine Gun, the Mauser Machine Pistol, the Uzi Submachine Gun, etc.
megados 25th Jan 2019, 3:57 PM edit delete reply

@guest, apologies if I was unclear, however Gilrandir has you covered. If I had to hazard a guess as to a specific weapon, in game, I'd guess it might be a 5mm minigun. It's a multi barrel Gatling type, with a high rate of fire. :D

@Sheela, I haven't played it, but by all accounts, I would have been disappointed. Family and friends sort of warned me away, because it has very few of the elements that, to me, make Fallout Fallout. It has none of the interactions, NPCs, no companions, and you're basically alone, unless you seek out a group. You cannot play offline, and what quests there are, and storyline there is, is given via holotapes, and text. Then there's bugs. Bethesda has always had a certain amount of bugs, but this supposedly has more. Usually, the bugs would be manageable, and modders would go a long way to help manage and fix them. I don't know if they could do that with '76'. That was enough to make me give it a pass. All that was left, seemed to be exploring. I Love exploring, but if that's all there is, it seems like it would get boring.

After that, I looked into it more, and found that it's been panned by many. Then there was the Collectors Edition (Power Armor Edition) in which a canvas bag was promised, and they cheaped out and gave out the canvas bag to 'influencers' but everyone else got a cheap nylon bag made in China.

There's a lot to type. You can look around the 'net, and find more! :D
robnot 25th Jan 2019, 4:50 PM edit delete reply
oh an don't forget the ' PVP gank-fest ' as it stands now, if killed in pvp, you start over at the vault, with nothing.. because they loot your cra.. stuff..
an the nukes can randomly blow your site off the map,, so start over...
and trading ..urg.. i get 1 random trader bout once a week,, an you can only trade to your level, no high end stuff.. an if you trade with another player,, no set prices, so they can charge whatever..
Sheela 26th Jan 2019, 1:27 AM edit delete reply

MegaDos : Yeah, that does sound pretty bad.

Robnot : Holy shit, that sounds downright toxic !
robnot 26th Jan 2019, 6:34 AM edit delete reply
yeah i think that's why they are pulling it off the shelf's ... almost all the online beta testers had bad experiences.. i mean , i played 30 min an was killed by other players 4 times...
Sheela 27th Jan 2019, 12:38 AM edit delete reply

And you cannot play it in a single player mode ?
robnot 27th Jan 2019, 6:36 AM edit delete reply
no .. an yes .. as Meagdos said you have to play online,, if you do not invite friends,, then there is no real story or quests.. an you still have the chance of a random nuke..
megados 27th Jan 2019, 9:57 AM edit delete reply

Here's an article

Like I said, I skipped it because it was missing so many of the elements that I associate with Fallout.
Mark_L_A 23rd Jan 2019, 8:38 AM edit delete reply

Rose, I'm still recovering from the cold I caught just before Christmas. The colors of the junk I've coughed up could be used for an impressionist painting. ;)

As for the story, I like how Noctis automatically trusts Dolly's judgement when it comes to security for Acantha.
megados 23rd Jan 2019, 8:50 AM edit delete reply

I noticed that too; Noctis has an amount of trust in Dolly, after seeing how far she went for Lynn.
Sheela 23rd Jan 2019, 12:10 PM edit delete reply

Don't forget that Dolly has .. a bit of a reputation !!
One strong enough that it has reached as far as Nova Roma, via gutter speak !
After all, she is DOLLY, THE TAYLOR GUARDIAN !!!
And lately, the rumors of Dolly Dagger and CeeCee Ryder is flourishing the wastelands too. 🀣
oldastronomer 23rd Jan 2019, 12:42 PM edit delete reply
Surely it would be of Blue Lady with helluva right kick (& deadly aim), and Ceci pink bubblegum bit with fangs?
Ictuan 23rd Jan 2019, 10:50 AM edit delete reply
Why do I have a feeling this entire story line has something to do with a recent really bad smartphone buying experience?
KarToon12 23rd Jan 2019, 1:14 PM edit delete reply

When it comes to phones, some things never change.
Gilrandir 23rd Jan 2019, 9:47 PM edit delete reply
Here is another warning that inspiration strikes me occasionally, and when it does the only safe thing to do is stop reading. Immediately. You have been warned.

You may imagine this as sung by Noctis (taking great liberties with her character, of course) to the tune of "Walking My Baby Back Home". Hope it entertains and/or amuses.

Taking a drive, 'cause Acantha's alive.
The wounds in her torso are sewn.
Lacking a crown, but we're out on the town,
Buying my Lady a phone.

Back in her home, which those here call New Rome,
Never had one of her own.
But here we are, in a loaned hovercar,
Buying my Lady a phone.

We shop for a while,
The salesclerks all smile.
They hope they will earn a large fee.
They wax eloquent
Of money well spent
On their special warranty!

Lunacom sells many decorative shells,
Miranda insists that we're shown
Every one, so we're nowhere near done
Buying my Lady a phone.

Credit or check, and my nerves are a wreck.
I have to guard her alone.
Looking aloof -- what is that on that roof?
Buying my Lady a phone.

For a few bucks, get the Service Deluxe,
Make "Let It Glow" your ringtone.
Heaven forfend, will this day ever end?
Buying my Lady a phone.
megados 24th Jan 2019, 7:00 AM edit delete reply

You have a genuine knack. This is great!

It's hard to imagine Noctis singing, but I wonder what she'd sound like.
Gilrandir 24th Jan 2019, 10:44 AM edit delete reply
Thank you.
Siren 24th Jan 2019, 12:06 AM edit delete reply
Bet the ModoCall brand releases updates that intentionally slow down the older model phones too. And those non-standard headphone hookups - ugh. Nightmare...
Siren 24th Jan 2019, 12:12 AM edit delete reply
Forgot to mention: great lighting in this scene.
Thracecius 24th Jan 2019, 12:07 PM edit delete reply

I'm glad I got over the "new and shiny" problem when I was still reasonably young (twenties), especially where it concerns books (I love used book stores with a good selection). With computer components I still buy new, but it doesn't have to be the latest and greatest, just has to do what I need it to do and help future proof the machine for awhile. My current rig, aside from an additional hard drive and a new video card, is almost five years old, so I figure it's been money well spent.

With a phone? I'm working on year five of my first smart phone that I barely use for more than phone calls, voicemail/texting and some web browsing, so I don't need a new one until this one craps out. Since it's a Motorola, I should be good for awhile. ;)
Ictuan 24th Jan 2019, 6:27 PM edit delete reply
The way I look at it is that a phone that is not getting OS and security updates is a threat to my home network and personal data security and must be replaced.

I also see constantly swapping out phones as a colossal waste of technology and raw materials that is contributing to an unsustainable accumulation of eWaste.

The belief that one must keep systems secure and the belief that swapping out our electronics is unsustainable creates a tension that must be balanced.

To balance these, what phone I buy all depends on which company has the best track record for pushing out OS and security updates the fastest and who supports their phones for the longest.

I will pick whose phone I'll buy and then time my purchase for when their latest model comes out and buy it as soon after that as possible. This way I get updates for the longest possible time and am able to reduce the frequency that I need to replace phones.

Another thing, I never buy a phone from a carrier. The reason is they have a horrible track record of updating phones in a timely fashion and they add their own bloat that opens up even more opportunities for security vulnerabilities. I always buy unlocked phones directly from the company producing the phone.
Thracecius 25th Jan 2019, 1:45 PM edit delete reply

Those are some nice tips. Thanks for sharing!
Oldarmourer 26th Jan 2019, 8:29 PM edit delete reply
My Galaxy 3 does everything I need it to, which brings us around to another method of sales manipulation...the deliberate non-support or 'forced retirement' of applications that still work perfectly well in favour of new bug-ridden ones that your older device is blocked from running so you have to go buy a new model for no reason other than there's no money to be made in letting you keep something you've already paid for.
knuut 27th Jan 2019, 6:54 PM edit delete reply
That's why I continue to pay for a land line and a phone with real honest to god wires.
Oldarmourer 28th Jan 2019, 8:24 AM edit delete reply
Always keep the land line...99% of the time they'll still work when the power goes out, since their power comes down the phone lines which are more often buried than hydro lines and less likely to be blown over or knocked down by freezing rain, etc. Cordless won't work when the mains go down and cell phones are only good as long as the battery lasts, but that old fashioned wired in phone will probably still make calls...just as long as you're not trying to call a dead cellphone ;)
Ictuan 28th Jan 2019, 7:16 PM edit delete reply
I work from home so redundancy is a must.
1) Landline via VOIP over cable
2) Personal smartphone with high data cap and tethering
3) Work Blackberry
4) ~8hr of battery backups on all critical computer/network/communications infrastructure.

If that all fails I can go into a branch about five minutes away. If that fails well, pretty much a serious event and nobody is going anywhere anyways.

Last week I withstood a five hour storm related power outage with no loss of productivity (other than constantly checking the power company's website for status update). It was kind of dark because our household lighting isn't on battery backup.
Ictuan 27th Jan 2019, 9:06 PM edit delete reply
One thing I like about the Google Pixel series is that they provide a guaranteed support life up front. Granted I'd like it to be longer, but at least I know for how long they will provide OS and security updates.

To be a little fair about support life, eventually, the hardware, especially batteries start to fail. Before we replaced it this past fall, my wife's old phone started to crash frequently when running Google Maps. In general, it was becoming very unreliable its last few months of use and the battery wasn't holding a charge as long.

If I could keep my smartphones on a four year rotation, I'd be happy.
Just_IDD 29th Jan 2019, 12:23 AM edit delete reply
Always get a phone with a removable battery, which lasts about 1.5 years.

The VOIPline is not a landline. The cable company is actually more likely to go offline than an actual landline. The cable company does not put Power backups in their cable distribution pods. Cell towers are only about 50% backed up. An actual landline is mandated by the FCC to have power supplied from the switching office. Each switching station has a backup generator and, a massive room full of batteries providing the power to the phones. That's 48vDC or 90vAC ring. That 48v becomes 3v-9v at the phone.

don't get me started on the fake planned obsolescence of cellphones. They have to have you buy new ones constantly because that's what they're basing their future profits on. There's no incentive under that model to build something with anything long-term durable.
Oldarmourer 29th Jan 2019, 9:58 AM edit delete reply
Exactitically. Which always amuses me when people think their smartphones will still work when the power goes out and the old landlines won't. If there isn't a functioning cell tower in range your 'smartphone' gets pretty dumb, pretty fast. Meanwhile I can pick up my old wire-to-the-wall phone and call Abu Dhabi...or I could if I knew anyone in Abu Dhabi...that I wanted to talk get the point ;)
Just_IDD 29th Jan 2019, 1:38 AM edit delete reply
Always get a phone with a removable battery, which lasts about 1.5 years.

The VOIPline is not a landline. The cable company is actually more likely to go offline than an actual landline. The cable company does not put Power backups in their cable distribution pods. Cell towers are only about 50% backed up. An actual landline is mandated by the FCC to have power supplied from the switching office. Each switching station has a backup generator and, a massive room full of batteries providing the power to the phones. That's 48vDC or 90vAC ring. That 48v becomes 3v-9v at the phone.

don't get me started on the fake planned obsolescence of cellphones. They have to have you buy new ones constantly because that's what they're basing their future profits on. There's no incentive under that model to build something with anything long-term durable.
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